Earning fame and heartthrob status at an early age for her ability to play the role of a wide range of colorful male leads, Corey Haim finally succumbed to her lifelong struggle against drug abuse Wednesday morning, after she was pronounced dead at 2:15AM at Providence St. Joseph Medical Center in Burbank, Los Angeles.
Emerging once again from Haim's shadow is long-time co-star Corey Feldman (pictured right, performing a detailed visual mammogram on former wife Susie Sprague's cleavage), who has already made a play to capitalize on his friend's untimely demise. According to Hollywood sources, Feldman has begun production on a straight-to-DVD movie chronicling Haim's final days called "License to Drive the Hurse," in which Feldman will lead a seemingly normal funeral procession only to come across an unlikely and comical turn of events that, while testing their friendship at times, ultimately brings them closer than ever.
Feldman describes the venture as a combination of "I Love You Man" and "Weekend at Bernie's" and hopes this surefire blockbuster will finally help the general public discern which Corey is Haim and which is Feldman. "Haim = Dead. Feldman = Alive. It doesn't get any easier than that," quipped Feldman...or Haim. Whichever one is still alive. And not a lesbian.
1 comment:
There's some website about hollywood aging men turning into lesbos, can't think of it now but it's worth a search.
Post a Comment